love | Dr.TomWagner

Dr. Tom has been sharing refreshing, insightful essays on his Sunday Morning Cafe blog since 2009. Each Sunday, he brings his extensive experience from resilience research, counseling, and consulting to help you find more connection, meaning, and joy in life. We're so glad you're here to grow with this community!

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Exodus

Faith traditions speak often about welcoming the stranger and the alien in our midst. This reflection explores what it means to see them—and not look away.

Dr. Tom Wagner

Mar 156 min read

Red barn with a green tank sits under a vibrant pink and purple sunset, with open fields in the background, evoking a serene mood.

Living in Memory of the Mountaintops

We may not always live on the mountaintop, but we can live in memory of it. This article explores how, even though moments of awe fade, we can intentionally remember them and let them guide how we see life and people.

Dr. Tom Wagner

Mar 88 min read

Foundations for a Brand New Marriage, or Making a Tired Marriage Brand New

The forming stage of a couple is not just romantic; it is formative. This reflection invites you to examine the roles, rules, and rhythms you are setting in place for the long haul.

Dr. Tom Wagner

Mar 13 min read

An empty bird's nest in a tree, signifying the empty nest stage of a marriage after the kids grow up and leave the house

Autumn Love: Building Resilient Marriages When the Nest is Empty

When the children leave home and togetherness increases, how will you navigate what it means to be individuals in the midst of it? This reflection explores resilient marriages in the empty nest phase of life.

Dr. Tom Wagner

Feb 224 min read

Relationship Repair: The Heart of Resilience

Close relationships will expose parts of you that still need maturing. The question is not whether you’ll fail — but whether you’ll repair. This reflection walks through what a real apology requires.

Dr. Tom Wagner

Feb 152 min read

Marriage Isn’t Hard Work; It’s Mostly Play

When relationships become all maintenance and no delight, something essential goes missing. This reflection explores how play restores the ease that love needs to endure.

Dr. Tom Wagner

Feb 86 min read

Why You Do NOT Have to Marry the Wrong Person

Your choice of spouse is the most important decision you will ever make. Here is a set of procedures, based on common-sense research, to choose a spouse wisely.

Dr. Tom Wagner

Feb 14 min read

Marriage: A People Growing Machine

What if the limits you keep meeting in your closest relationships are the very engine of your growth? A reflection on marriage, endurance, and human formation.

Dr. Tom Wagner

Jan 256 min read

In Praise of the Good Enough

There is something to be said for the good enough marriage—where flaws, over time, are slowly turned into gifts. This reflection explores commitment, growth, and shared purpose.

Dr. Tom Wagner

Jan 186 min read

Presents in Wrinkled Wrapping Paper

What if the path to intimacy with the Sacred runs straight through the lives of the sick, the frail, and the aging? This reflection explores how love reshapes itself when strength gives way.

Dr. Tom Wagner

Dec 14, 20255 min read